Hello, yesterday I got stood up (sort of?) and I had way too much time on my hands in between shopping and waiting for my sister to come pick me up to think (yet again) about why I’m still single and I guess I’ve come to the realization one of the possible reasons for the same could be that I stick to a type of men always.
I most certainly have a type. I like ambitious, focused men with big dreams, massive guns, cute butts, perfectly groomed beards, moderately high (umm) levels of arrogance (I’d want an equal, after all of course) and high intellect. Of course men like this are almost too good to be true or turn out to be absolute assholes. Or they busy hustlin’, and have no time to date. (why do i have so much time on my hands, i need to be doing more things goddammit)
But doesn’t every one have a type? One type of person you’re almost always easily drawn to?
So how does one develop a type anyway?
I believe mine has emerged from the first man I ever seriously dated (tall, hot, ambitious, arrogant, absolute asshole, the relationship pretty much went to shit in the end but ayyy, was I a happy clam while it lasted). It is beyond me why I still stick to this type despite it not having a happy ending for me. But I guess it gave me a few wonderful memories that I still fondly hold close to my heart. So I guess I’ve a type because it’s comfortable. I KNOW what it’d be like to date someone like that again (the happy part y’all, I’m no masochist) (or am I? Mm hmm, I’d have to ponder on this next).
Anywaaaaaaay, the point of the rant was for me to put my thoughts on paper and basically understand I’m being an idiot by sticking to a type. I guess, there’s not much I can compromise when it comes to intellect and ambition (because really I’m hella ambitious and I personally think I’m smart as hell, no Shireen stop laughing fuck you I’m smart, and yeah so basically I couldn’t ever relate to someone who is not like me) but physically, definitely. Not all men are gym freaks and really, I don’t understand my intense attraction to the type (when I myself no longer work out, highly hypocritical yes I know. SIGH) but I’m aware I’m missing out on a lot of men who simply have other priorities like work, uni, family or goals that just happen to take up most of their time (but not pot, definitely no compromise there, I’ll never seriously date a regular stoner nuh uh simply because I can’t enjoy it, and I’m yet to come across a high functioning person on pot and I find addicts to anything weak, and hello I need someone I’ll grow stronger with)
At the end of the day, am I going to want to go home to a good heart or a good body? Both seems ideal (heh) but really I guess at the end of the day I just want to be loved and have someone to lean on when things get tough and so good heart, it is.
But then again, I urge you to never settle for anything less than what you absolutely deserve, and I’m telling you, you deserve someone who’s head over heels in love with you, who makes you abso-fucking-lutely happy, who gives you butterflies every time you kiss, who makes you a priority and never has you insecure about your place in a relationship and who makes you want to be a better version of yourself every single day. Now that’s one type of partner I believe everyone should stick to.